And my efforts to reclaim my life and gain independence.
Tuesday, June 17, 2008
Endure
I do not know what else I am supposed to do. More than anything else in this world I want the love and devotion of my children. I’ve done everything in my power to encourage that too. However with the lies and manipulation of their mother, she has encouraged nothing but resentment and discontent of me in my children. She will never let a chance slip by her when she has the opportunity to say everything negative about me that she can. No matter how minuscule and an unrelated to the topic at hand, if she can tell somebody that will listen, she will indulge them about what kind of piece of shit I am.Compounded with the fact that I am incapable of paying child support at this current juncture in my life only proves to feed her ever increasing hatred of me. Even when I am paying child support regularly she is never happy. My ex-wife is a person that thrives in an environment where she can be the catalyst of negativity. She possesses a personality that will never be content if she cannot cause turmoil. The more pain and resentment she can cause in people that she comes into contact with, the better she will feel. I am vexed as to why she insists on behaving in this manner.
My son at least is still willing to visit me, however I am sure what I’ll say when I see him Thursday, he will have a whole lot of questions. I am uncertain of how I am supposed to proceed from this point. I just wish that my ex-wife understood that I never planned any of this and the last thing that I ever wanted in my life was to be disabled. I wish that she could be positive and encourage my rehabilitation process, thus insuring her own future as well when I am capable of paying child support. Alas however that is what a reasonable would do and my ex-wife is a person that is far from being reasonable, and her only wish is to spread as much negativity about me that she can is capable of doing.
it must be hard for you, but you should know that you are a strong person! one of the strongest i've ever seen. i struggle with ADD and i can realy imagen how it must feel for you with your kids and all that, by the way, am 15 as well as your daughter. but i want you to know that you deffently shows the world that you can do it, that every one can do it. and for you to belive in your self make me belive in my self too, you effect the people around you too. we all have our bad days but we should know that we are speciall, and god chosed us to have this disorders and he want us to be MASTER of the things we are good at! well i'm not religious or anything like that but i will allways turnes to god (or my psychologist) if im deprest/need help with something.. i would love to write with you about how you deal with you problems and stuff like that because i can need a extra person to talk to, a person that truely understands me till 100% and i think you maybe want have a person like that too, just like a random person that isnt a psychologist or anything like that. Take care //thandiwe
I would like very much to hear from you. Leesshane@yahoo.com OR Leesshane@gmail.com Also be sure to chech out at my Youtube page at. http://www.youtube.com/user/LeesShane
VERY IMPORTANT
I would feel like I'm an asshole for creating a blog bitching about how much AD/HD has impacted my life and not offer at least some information that can help people who have it too. So this will be my one and only Public Service announcement.
AD/HD or ADD is not a disease, its a neurological disorder. I know from my own experiences just how bad it can be. People who have this affliction often times feel like that they are all alone. They may feel alienated, like nobody understands them, and they may be suffering from serious depression. If you or somebody else you know has AD/HD or ADD, they're (you're) not alone. I am not a professional and I do not feel like I am qualified to offer advice. So I decided to post some links to organizations and support groups that can help.
1 comment:
it must be hard for you, but you should know that you are a strong person! one of the strongest i've ever seen. i struggle with ADD and i can realy imagen how it must feel for you with your kids and all that, by the way, am 15 as well as your daughter. but i want you to know that you deffently shows the world that you can do it, that every one can do it. and for you to belive in your self make me belive in my self too, you effect the people around you too. we all have our bad days but we should know that we are speciall, and god chosed us to have this disorders and he want us to be MASTER of the things we are good at! well i'm not religious or anything like that but i will allways turnes to god (or my psychologist) if im deprest/need help with something.. i would love to write with you about how you deal with you problems and stuff like that because i can need a extra person to talk to, a person that truely understands me till 100% and i think you maybe want have a person like that too, just like a random person that isnt a psychologist or anything like that. Take care //thandiwe
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